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Claddagh Jewelry from Ireland Wedding and Family Rings, Pendants.

Barroom Normal

A man walks into a bar with an ostrich and a cat and sits at the bar. The bartender walks over to them and says "What can I get for you?"
The man says, "I’ll have a beer," the I’m not buying."
The bartender gets them their beer and says, "That’ll be $3.87."
The man reaches into his pocket and brings out the exact change and pays him.
A couple of days later they come back into the bar and the bartender walks over and asks, "What do you guys want today?"
The man says, "I’ll have a scotch," the ostrich says, "I’ll have a bourbon," and the cat says, "I’ll have half a beer, and I’m not buying." So the bartender says, "OK, that will be $7.53."
The man reaches into his pocket and brings out the exact change and pays him.
Courtney Link to Blonde Jokes The bartender’s curiosity got the best of him and he asks, "Why is it that every time I tell you the amount you owe you always have the exact change in you pocket?"
The man said "I found a bottle with a genie in it and she granted me 3 wishes. My first wish was that I always have the exact change in my pocket for anything I buy.
"The bartender says that’s a great wish...better than asking for a million dollars. A million dollars will run out but that never will. What were your other 2 wishes?"
The man says, "That’s where I screwed up. I asked for a chick with long legs and a tight pussy."
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I went to the bar the other night and told the 'keep, "A glass of your finest Less, please."
"'Less'? Never heard of it," he said.
"C'mon, sure you have."
"No, really, we don't stock it. What is it? Some kind of foreign beer?"
"I'm not sure," I replied. "It was my doctor who mentioned it. He said I should 'drink Less.'"

Inner Peace

I am passing this on to you because it works!
By following the simple advice I read in an article, I have finally found inner peace ...
It read: "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you've started."
So I looked around to see all the things I started and hadn't finished.
So, today I have finished one small bottle of vodka, a bottle of red wine, a bottle of Jack Daniel's, my Prozac, a small box of chocolates and a half-gallon of Baskin Robbins rocky road.
You have no idea how good I feel.

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